Imagine you’ve been studying all week for a big exam. It could be the MCAT, LSAT, graduate qualifying exams, or just some test that is important for you. You take the exam, but you’re not sure whether you did really well, or performed poorly. A couple weeks later, you get back your results, only to find that you did poorly. How would you react? Would you be angry, depressed, or would you find the strength to keep plugging away and try again? What about if tomorrow your best friend came and insulted you? Would you be able to take it?

Do you have the capacity to absorb the shocks of life? This was the question Swami Adhyatma Chaitanya asked our gathering of HSC students at the University of Florida. It was a simple question, but one to which no one at our gathering could respond. We know how we typically respond to such situations. Our emotions take control of us, and may cause us to make many foolish decisions. One person might get drunk to try and drown their sorrows, while another might react angrily against friends who try to comfort them. Even less severe and more common reactions might cause you to feel depressed, confused, or unconfident. All of these destroy our balance and happiness in life, so it is natural for us to seek an effective way for dealing with them.

When one experiences a shock, there is typically a two-stage reaction. First there is the shock, disbelief, and non-acceptance. Someone comes to you and tells you that your new car was stolen. “What?!” you might ask in disbelief. Immediately all of these unhealthy reactions rush to the forefront. However, eventually you are forced to accept the fact that your car was stolen, and end up buying a new one. Maybe a few years later someone asks you about the car that was stolen. Instead of getting angry or depressed, you think, “So what, it’s in the past. After all, these things happen in life, you just have to deal with them.” From the initial reaction, we then calm down, come to accept the situation we are presented with, and work from there. This gap, between ‘what’ and ‘so what’, is what we have to eliminate, Swamiji told us. It is the size of this gap that can help us to see our level of maturity in life as well.

Now that we have understood how we typically react, we should look at how one can actually deal with the shocks of life without any negative reactions. To illustrate this, Swamiji used a different example. A person traveling on a country road in India via bullock cart will end his journey with many aches and pains. That’s because every time the cart hits a bump in the road, the force goes directly to the rider. There is nothing there to cushion the impact. Now consider a second person driving a brand new BMW or Lexus. Unlike the bullock cart that bounces the rider up and down, this car may be so smooth the driver doesn’t even realize the speed. This person may not feel tired at all after driving a much longer distance. This is because the car absorbs the shocks, so the driver feels comfortable. Similarly, when we face life, generally we take each shock directly, and get tossed about. As Swamiji explained, it is spirituality that is the shock absorber for life.

Sadness, anger, and disbelief are all natural reactions to a setback. However, these are all negative and counterproductive responses that cause us to lose our balance in life. If spirituality simply forces us to hide these reactions, then it will be of no use to us. That is because even though we may hide our reaction, the internal pressure remains. Thus, the solution we are looking for is one that involves sublimation of these emotions, not suppression. How does spirituality help us sublimate our negative emotions? The answer is simple: by transferring the shock to God. Spirituality can provide an avenue for us to express these negative emotions in a healthy and constructive way. Instead of taking to drinking or abusing people around them, devotees may immerse themselves in singing bhajans or praying. By crying out to God, we still have an avenue of expressing our emotions, yet we express them in a way that is positive, not suppressive.

There is a second way in which spiritual study prepares us to deal with the shocks of life. By giving us insights into our divine nature, and the divine nature of all things, it helps to lend some perspective to the situations that we find ourselves in. The science of the Self that underlies Hinduism has the capacity to give each of us tremendous strength. This is because the whole process it leads us on is one of self-discovery. As we grow, we discover the tremendous strength that we all have inside. Once we are able to tap into this strength, we gain the power to shrug off the misfortunes that may occur in life. It is this strength that has allowed Hindus to deal with tremendous adversity through the millennia that we have survived.

You may be wondering, what is so special about what I’m suggesting. I mean, after all, there are many psychiatrists and clinical psychologists that can help people deal with their problems, so why should spirituality be necessary? It is necessary because modern psychology has not yet been able to reveal the real nature of a human being. While therapy might help an individual talk through or deal with the situations that bother them, it is through the study of the spirit that they will gain the inner strength and maturity to accept what life gives. In spirituality we gain a tool to transfer our shocks and negative emotions. Eventually this tool gives us the strength to face life, confident in our ability to deal with any situation, because it reveals to us our own inner strength.